Minding my age

Sometimes, someone says something that rubs me the wrong way. Last night, a young man (who admitted being half my age) said to Alt #11, "i dont worry if ur 40 and divorced."

I bristled.

By saying that he doesn't mind my age, he implied that being in my 40's and divorced somehow makes me less desirable.

I told him that his comment made me feel insulted. I didn't put that information in my profile to apologize for being older. I put it there to attract older men, or at least to attract men who actually enjoy -- and not just settle for -- women in their 40s.

So I wished him goodnight and ended the conversation.

To his credit, he apologized and said that he didn't mean it that way. Some people are not aware of their own prejudices.

I'm not saying all young men think that way either. Just a couple of weeks ago, I met a very sweet (and very flirty) 18-year-old at the same place, and he flatters me. In fact, he's one of my new would-be lovers, but I haven't mentioned him in this blog til now. I don't think it'll get deep, however, but the flirtations are charming. His nickname? "Hot Wings". ;)

To twit or not to twit

Last week, I received an invitation to start a Plurk account. I already got a Plurk invitation months ago from the another friend, the same one who introduced me to Twitter.

So I already have a Twitter for my real life. And I'm still trying to decide if I want to start a Twitter for Opal. You see, microblogging is like writing a status report for your boss in your real life work. The more time you spend reporting, the less time you actually *do* work.

Opal has a Facebook account but not much activity there either, because, well, it seems odd. Facebook is a social network, Second Life is a social network, and Opal is a persona inside Second Life. So, Opal's Facebook becomes the social network for a character in another social network. Social networking on top of social networking.

I once received a friendship request from someone who's not even in Second Life. He was intrigued by the avatar picture. But I refused to accept the friendship offer unless he came into SL and met me avatar-to-avatar. LOL. Unfortunately, his machine cannot handle SL, which is too bad because he sounded like a very interesting man. But the problem is that social interaction on the web now seems pale in comparison to social interaction in SL. Even if I accepted his friendship, I rarely go into Facebook, so I wouldn't be interacting with him much anyway.

Besides, I *hate* Facebook's design. There's too much junk! What's with all these quizzes that don't mean anything and gifts that you can't use? The interface is so cluttered and the navigation is so convoluted that you can't find the link to what you actually need.

Anyway, back to Twitter and Plurk.... I have, in fact, already explored Plurk. Alt #9 has (unused) accounts in both. And Plurk's "karma" reminds me of chain emails.... "If you don't invite ten of your friends to join in the next ten minutes, you will die...." I'm exaggerating, of course, but you know what I mean.

However, there *is* value in Twittering. It saves me time by broadcasting to friends and family that I'm still alive and well. And it saves *them* time from sifting through my blog, especially since you can receive twits to your cellphone. I won't be sending twits from my cellphone for Opal's account though, because you can only associate one Twitter account with each cellphone number. But I could use it for short bursts of wisdom (or smart ass-ness). On the other hand, I can do those short bursts here in this blog too.

Hmmmmm.... Let me think some more about it.

Into the fourth

Maybe it's because of the history of computer gaming that people behave the way they do in SL. In the first generation of computer games, we competed with the machine. In the second generation, we played with other people by shooting each other down or slashing each other with a sword. And here we are, in the third generation, where we use each other.

I understand that it is easy to forget that we are not the only thinking and feeling souls in SL. Sometimes, it's as though we're interacting with machines. And, even if we do keep in mind that there are other souls in here, we behave as though they are exactly like us, that they think the same thoughts and feel the same emotions.

But they don't necessarily. In fact, we encounter more diversity in SL than we do in real life. In real life, most of us have learned to blend in with the communities we live and work in. To a degree, we share the same culture, the same language, the same customs, even the same beliefs and principles. And we rarely encounter people who have nothing in common with us, because we don't frequent the same places that they do. But, in SL, all of humanity's diversity is thrown into the same pot.

Yes, after we get tired of exploring all of SL, we finally settle on a number of places that we enjoy. Still, the likelihood of meeting people who are very different from us is much greater than the likelihood of meeting them in real life. And for that reason, we need more tolerance in SL than in real life.

And an integral part of that tolerance includes respect for the other person as a human being. We may not agree with their views. We may not approve of their actions. But they deserve some respect anyway. Respect for their humanness, respect for their free will.

I have, in fact, met very many good souls in SL. So, in spite of one or two bad experiences, I still have hope about SL and MMORPGs in general. Maybe we're coming into the fourth generation of gaming, where we really are creating an ideal virtual world, not just ideal in the visible and the auditory, but also ideal in its soulfulness.

The young 'uns

"I'm not a kid."

I heard that twice already in my short lifetime in SL. The first time, from a 19-year-old, who wanted to take me to the sex temple, and who resented the fact that I called him "jailbait." The second time, from a 15-year-old, who sneaked into the adult grid because he wanted to make money and be able to curse, and who begged me not to ban him.

However, to a woman in her early forties, they ARE kids. I figured I would meet mostly 20-somethings in SL, and I was relieved when the first person I met was only two years my junior, so I guess there's a wide range of ages in SL. I don't always ask people how old they are, but I can pretty much intuit someone's maturity level by the way they behave, by their interests, by the way they talk.

I've met other young people -- a builder who just needs company and approval, a sensitive soul who had to deal with harsh words from his peers, and others who just want to hang out.

However, sometimes, these kids surprise me. The 19-year-old had already thoughtfully formed his own theories about existence, for instance.

They seem to know the basics of staying safe online. And when I warned the 15-year-old to stay away from the adult areas, he said, "I hate that stuff, it's not meant to be on a game." Hopefully, that innocence would protect him.

Both said I needn't worry about them, but my maternal instincts still nag at me....