Personal boundaries

Before I start, I just wanted to give an update. Racer and I went our separate ways because he said that, if I would not be his love slave, he didn't want me. So that was that.

New lover

But now, I have a new lover, also with Alt #11. I danced with this one before and I thought it wasn't going to develop into anything. But he saw me today at Sweethearts again when he logged in. (Apparently, he doesn't leave Sweethearts.) And almost immediately, he asked me to dance even though I was already in IM with two other guys. So I said I was going to wrap up my convos first. He waited. Both the other two also asked me for a dance but I said I was already asked. One of them actually waited for hours, hoping to get a dance afterwards, until he finally gave up and went to bed.

Even though he was already sleepy, new lover stayed with me for hours, and somehow the conversation felt as though we were negotiating terms for a romantic and sexual relationship. We went to Sunset Jazz then to the Africa sim for a balloon ride. I've been to the Africa sim many times before. A lover introduced me to that sim. However, I had never taken the balloon ride before today, and the last time I went on any rides with a lover was on the now-gone Acropolis sims.

I'll call this lover "Victor", because I told him that his avie (with the tux he was wearing today) looks like a Victorian gentleman, which somehow made me think of being ravished inside a horse carriage. Yeah, we'll be trying that RP sometime. *winks*

(Update: I'm changing his nickname to "Lucky Bastard" because, when he asked me for a dance, one of the convos I had to wrap up called him that. And after my week-long binge I gave him a custom "Etched" set with those words on it, as a thank you gift.)

Anyway, after he logged off, I logged in as Opal and decided to go to Franks since I was still dressed in that new gorgeous red gown that I bought from Son!a's for New Year's.


I was standing quietly in the corner by the stairs, checking out profiles when I suddenly got an IM that said:
[2011/01/01 23:58] Flirt Sorciere puts some mistletoe over head and boldly kisses her while saying "Happy New Year"!

That pissed me off. I wanted to choke him. Instead, I said, "You can easily get slapped that way."

How would you feel if you were just quietly standing in public and a complete stranger comes up behind you and kisses you? It's a transgression in my personal space. I'd consider that a form of rape. He didn't even give me a chance to react and prevent him from kissing me. Even the vampire in the Africa sim at least asked for my permission first.

Some people would say it's just SL. I'd say how is that different? Just because I'm in SL and my avatar is just made of pixels, it doesn't mean anybody can do with my avatar as they pleased.

This guy's rez date was recent, so I asked if this was his first account in SL. He replied "no". If he were a real newbie, I would have forgiven him. I would have thought that he just didn't know what the proper etiquette is in SL. But if he's been in SL a while, that behavior is inexcusable.

If he did that in real life to a complete stranger, his face would be slapped, his foot stomped on, and his balls kneed. And deservedly so. And if I had a boyfriend with me, he would probably have been beaten to a pulp too.

The guy disappeared soon after. I guess he finally realized what he did was not welcomed at all.