Sunday, November 28, 2010

Barcelona del Oeste

Barcelona del Oeste is gone.

Well, the sim still exists, but the build is gone. When you teleport to the sim, you end up in a store up in the sky. At ground level, there's a sign that says:
REMODELACION SIM
"BARCELONA DEL OESTE"
ESTAMOS TRABAJANDO EN ELLO
DISCULPAD LAS MOLESTIAS


It saddens me. The original Barcelona del Oeste was also a mall after all, but it was more than just a mall. It had character. With monuments, a beach, park benches, a cathedral. It was a nice place to hang out and mellow out.

I had wonderful memories with friends dancing inside the Cafe or sitting on one of the tables in the plaza. I remember skating around the perimeter of the sim.

Now, it's gone. Like many of the treasures of Second Life.

Or, maybe it's symbolic. Maybe what I'm really grieving for is the end of my last affair. He hadn't been in for weeks now. I've lost count. I sent him email and joked asking if his doctor forbid him to come into Second Life because I'm likely to cause him a heart attack. He laughed. He replied that it's his computer technician who prevents him from installing Second Life. I figured if he really wanted to, he would find a way; I even told him about the text-based clients and offered to communicate by Skype like we used to. I think he really doesn't want to. He loves me, but he doesn't want to see me. And I couldn't accept that fact. Until now.

I had asked him to play an Il Divo song for me in his radio show when he thinks of me. Now, I listen to Il Divo and, instead of feeling immense joy with the rousing notes, I feel deep sadness.

So I stand here on the empty Barcelona del Oeste beach. After more than four years, I'm still not used to the transience of places and people in this world. And I may never.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Gifts

I received an order today for matching Ms.O.Lei-ny "Etched in Stone" sets with a custom message. The customer included a message for the recipient. She was releasing him unwillingly and this was a goodbye gift.

This is the first time I've heard of this product being used as a way to say goodbye. When I created it, it was meant to express love. I suppose, it still is. Sometimes, the greatest act of love is letting go.

From my perspective, she gave him two gifts. And the jewelry set is the lesser of the two.

I wish them both the best.


Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Positive spin

I've updated my profile. I've been reading all these Law of Attraction stuff on the web and it said to put your wishes out to the world in positive terms, because what you focus on is what you get.

Okay.

So instead of the "Leave me be..." tab in my Picks, I now have this tab instead:


Love me...

... only if you understand that SL is NOT a game, because it isn't to me and my heart is not a plaything.

... only if you understand that drama is necessarily a part of any relationship that involves strong emotions, like love.

... only if you see the beauty of my avatar as a reflection of my creativity and my technical skill, and you could love, not the beauty you see, but the mind that created it.

... only if you don't expect me to fight for your affections, because love should be a willing coming-together of two souls, not a chasing-after. If I have to fight for you, you're not worth fighting for.

... only if you understand that SL is NOT separate from RL, and commitments made in SL have the same weight as commitments made in RL. Meeting me in a virtual world doesn't make me less human or less worthy of respect than people you meet in real life.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Runaway bride

Gracie Kendal is building a collection of pictures of avatars for "a project on identity and anonymity."

One of her friends took her to my glass house to view the morphing portraits and she invited me to pose for her. She thought I was kidding when I asked, "The question is how you want me to look... with a mermaid tail, with legs, darker skin, fair skin, red hair, blond hair, dark hair, formal, casual, ethnic, strange, masked, tattoos? Do you want my alts too? My alts don't have as many choices."

*grins*

Well, I decided on wearing the Mer Betta Pasithea and made a pose for the shoot, which we did today.

When I did my interview for MODA Spotlight, one of the tasks was to wear something that I felt represented me, and I wore the Pasithea then too. And here's why: I created the first bridal mermaid in Second Life. Ironically, Opal has never been partnered. In fact, only one of my alts has ever been partnered, and then I put her in hibernation immediately after, because it really was just a symbolic partnership.

Now, the intriguing aspect of Gracie's project is that all the avatars are facing away from the camera. And one of the photos she took of me with the custom pose looked as though I was swimming away from the camera. I remarked that I looked like a runaway bride, and I thought it was so appropriate.

One of my "rules" is that Opal will only be partnered in SL if I am engaged to the same man in real life. But I have long-term commitment issues in real life. Ergo, the runaway bride.

Gracie took more pictures using the poses in my Kamihitoe AO, so I don't know if she'll eventually use that runaway bride shot. But the project is on display as she continues to add photos to the collection. And not all the photos show up in her blog or Flickr, so check it out inworld.

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