I honestly don't know what happened. All of a sudden, he was avoiding me, he was logging in only when I wasn't in, and he wasn't responding to either emails or IMs.

He had done it to someone else before. Once, when we were chatting, he said he was ignoring a friend who sent him an IM and not responding at all. He said they were meaningless. So, I figured, this time, I became one of the "meaningless".

So, when I finally caught him online, I said my goodbyes as civilly as I could. In a monologue, because he never responded. He probably already muted me by then, like he did his ex.

I don't think I jumped the gun too soon, although my instinct was to run away as fast as I could. But I gave him the benefit of a doubt for almost a week. That was almost half the length of the affair itself.

I had been in a similar situation in the past. Opened my soul to another, who suddenly decided to stop talking to me for no apparent reason. Well, not apparent to me, at least. It was very painful then and I'm sure some of the pain this time around came from that first incident.

I sent him a copy of the monologue by email, just to make sure. I was already hiding from everyone since the day before, to be a hermit for a while. The next day, he removed me from his friends list.

That was last week. I'm still being a hermit.

132.25 kilometers

RFL 2010 Final Pedometer

That's how far I ran this weekend on the Relay for Life track in Second Life. That was about 15.5 laps, with each lap taking 8,500 meters and approximately 45 minutes.

I was up all night, since I had out-of-town friends visiting yesterday, and it's easier at night anyway. Of course, I took breaks too.

This year, I prepared for the hourly themes. But, when one of the DJs on the music stream reminded us of Kimmera Madison's RFL gown, I kept an eye out for it and bought it when I passed by the vendor. I decided to use that instead for the Formal Wear lap, just before the Closing Ceremonies.

Kevlin (who wanted to show me his new shape) tagged along with the "Walk and Talk" for a while. Hans (who came as a cute little ferret) was planning to, but work called his attention and he never got back. Vann came just briefly. But all of them got a luminary. The MODA models joined me at 8am today and we sashayed our way through the lag in our gorgeous gowns. After the Closing Ceremonies, I did one more lap, but, this time, dancing.

What's awesome is that, during the RFL, all the oldbies come out of the woodwork. So many familiar names on the track. Not just friends and acquaintances either, but also people whose names I've only seen as creators on prims.

As of 11am today, the total amount raised was US$214,211.

And, oh, yeah, unlike last year, I already have a boyfriend. ;)

Gone blonde

Well, he met me as a blonde. And he likes blondes. So, ...

Profile 20100714

Yup, I've gone blonde. :)

There are several reasons I changed the skin too. My old skin doesn't look quite right with blonde. He met my alt in this skin as a blonde (don't ask). He thinks this skin looks "angelic" and softer than my old skin.

I've created brand new alts for lovers before. Alt #9 was a redhead because her lover is attracted to redheads. So, why not go blonde for this new lover?

It's still going well. We still keep talking, talking, talking, like old friends catching up on each other's lives after a lifetime of being apart. Maybe our souls *are* old friends catching up on each other's lives after a lifetime of being apart.

I feel very comfortable around him. No pressure, no rush. And there is a depth of character in him that I never expected and it's a wonderful surprise.

(If you notice another face superimposed over the trees and lake, yup, that's him.)

Gone exclusive

He was born in SL two weeks after I was. In January 9, 2007, he stood two meters away from me during a live music event. (I found a line in my chat logs where my radar said he was "02m" away.)

Yesterday, I met him. Today, we became exclusive. On all alts.

We talked for hours today. We found out we have so many things in common, both in RL and in SL. And we shared the same perspective about SL; we both acknowledge that SL is not separate from RL, and we both know how powerful this medium could be.

After he logged off, I tried to transfer my cuddles HUD and my sex HUD (both from Digital Dreams) from my RP alt to Opal, and I forgot that I had set Opal to busy. SL ate the HUDs; they're not in either inventory. Maybe the universe is trying to tell me something....

(Update: The HUDs eventually showed up in my inventory. I guess I can have sex again. LOL)

"RL takes precedence"

When someone says "RL takes precedence," what they really mean is that you're not important. To them, you're just a doll that they take down from the shelf to play with when they feel like it, then they put you back up on the shelf when they're done.

Of course, they don't like it when you treat them the same way, because, well, *they* are important.

But that's just the way things are. *We* and *ours* are important to ourselves. And everybody else is chopped liver. And we assign greater value to things that are tangible, or at least things that *seem* tangible to us. Except it's too arrogant to admit that, so people just say, "RL takes precedence."

I've never said "RL takes precedence." But if the occasion arises, I hope that I'd be courageously honest enough to say, "I'm sorry, you're not that important to me. Cutting my toenails in RL takes precedence over you in SL."