Saturday, January 23, 2010

48 hours

Is it possible to fall in love with someone within a 48-hour period? And you know it's not infatuation and it's not hormones. It doesn't feel rushed, it doesn't feel forced, and it doesn't feel like roleplay.

The more I get to know him, the deeper I fall. It feels like I've loved him for a lifetime.

I had doubts about the emotions. I still have doubts about the relationship working out. I'm pragmatic. Been there, done that too many times. But, last night, I realized that it would really hurt a lot when it comes time to give him up.

When I committed to be exclusive to him for 30 days on the first night we met, it was a logical decision. This morning, it became an emotional commitment.

Today, he sent me this link to YouTube and asked me to listen. He said that this is how he sees me.


I am overwhelmed.


Today, the Captain responded to my email and he gave me his blessings. I was also able to reach another young lover, who said he hated me after he heard the news. But he forgave me in the end, after he realized that what I found is much more than just a sexual arrangement. I still have two good friends and I am very grateful for that.


When I woke up today, this song was playing in my head:


"He came into my life and made the living fine... He fills my heart...."

He fills my heart. I am overflowing.

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