First, Rapido was admitted to a hospital because of a heart attack. Two days later, my mom was admitted to a hospital because her heart stopped beating. They had to install a pacemaker on her. My sister wanted me to come home to help out. I decided it was time to go home for good. So, I'm in the middle of finishing up commitments, planning the move, and looking for a job in California.
Wolfgang senses the stress because I'm touchy and he's normally touchy anyway. So we argued. Even with our F-F pair. The last one stretched for three days and ended yesterday. It's not that we argued for three days; it's just that the feeling lasted for two additional days.
He doesn't promise to keep the friendship if we ever break up. So I proposed that we downgrade our relationship to a friendship now before we have an argument that is so explosive that he'd never speak to me again.
My proposal upset him even more. He knows I rarely have time for friends, so, from his perspective, it's the same thing. He was feeling rejected and the argument continued. I had to explain that I was actually trying to keep him in my life, but he doesn't see it that way.
On the second day, we were both calmer but still melancholy. I told him that, because of what I'm going through in real life, I needed to be held and I needed his protection, his support, and his maleness. But I was afraid to ask for our M-F pair because he might construe it as rejecting our F-F pair. He agreed that he probably would have, but he said I could ask anyway.
We had already decided that we would meet as our M-F pair on Thursdays, because the last time we did, it felt like we were strangers again. So we met as our M-F pair this morning and it feels warmer and more comforting. We started to talk about our RPs and about doing a recurring RP for each of our pairs, with occasional short RPs with different scenarios.
Wolfgang#3: i like think about projectsSo, that settles it.... We're building a future with him and me. Not him and his ponytail.
Wolfgang#3: yes like main rp, it shows some future wish
Alt#27: Future wish for what?
Wolfgang#3: wishes of future
Alt#27: a future together, you mean?
Wolfgang#3: build some future
Wolfgang#3: yes, not with my ponytail
/me shakes her head and mumbles, "Smart ass...." :D