I haven't written much this year. Probably because this year has been the most stable for me; romantically, that is.
I met the Captain in February, neither of us thought we'd be together this long, neither of us wanting a serious relationship. It was supposed to be just casual -- "amics amb dret a cuixa", friends with privileges -- but the emotions ran deep. He truly has been my anchor. I hear from him infrequently now; I see him even less. But we both know each other in real life now, and I feel great joy knowing that he loves me and that the friendship is real.
Meanwhile, I've taken other lovers who came, stayed a while, and faded away. Would the secondary relationships have developed if I didn't have the Captain? Probably not. However, I think the Captain gave me some insulation from the ups and downs of other relationships as they came and went. Something similar to the safety net that married people have when having affairs in SL.
But I received more blessings than that. Former lovers and flirting friends -- the few who never officially became lovers -- surprised me with how deeply they cared.
If I have realized anything this past year, it is that the more freedom we have to love, the greater becomes our capacity to love and be loved. These men have showed me that. When love is not bound, it multiplies.
Love is not a zero-sum game.
The question now becomes: Could I be bound to just one man again after I've experienced this?